Day 31

No change on symptoms. Back still occasionally sore, tired and breasts are becoming very tender. Went to get the form to fill in to self refer to the midwives. It asks which hospital you want your baby to be born in. This is  dilemma for me. There is a hospital near where my parents live, most convenient for us too. It has a designated neonatal unit. It is however where I had to go through two lots of surgery for the miscarriage I had last year and the experience I had puts me off giving birth there. It was very unorganised and made the situation much worse for me. On the day of my 13 week scan where we learned the baby no longer had a heartbeat the sonographer was foreign and could not properly translate what was happening. Instead all she could say was "Sorry" and ran off to get another member of staff to explain. Afterwards we were left in a room on the maternity ward for four hours before a Doctor came to speak with us. We then returned the following day to the same ward and had to sit for four further hours before the surgery took place. I bled for 15 weeks and yet noone from the Hospital believed there was anything wrong. They kept insisting I was having a period. I was rushed by ambulance to hospital when I haemmorhaged at home and yet they still thought it was a period. Since I didn't have cycles they decided I wouldn't know what that looked or felt like so they sent me home. Two weeks later I started to pass tissue. Only then did they realise something was very wrong and did emergency surgery to remove the remaining fetal material. A few days later I got a letter acknowledging a genetic screen which had been done on my "son". Thankfully the screen was clear however I wasn't expecting them to tell me my 12 week old embryo was male! I will talk this through with my Mum tomorrow see what she thinks.